How Blue The Sky Is At Midnight

It’s time to go

We waited for this

We worked for this

We broke and cried and bled

All for this

It’s time to go

You can say goodbye and hug each other and get a couple pictures but after that you have to be done. No there isn’t another dance there’s no next period there is no game next week or one more Friday night

You have to be done

Remember those dreams you had? The ones you dedicated your hours to and the secret ones that slept on your lips, not ready to jump out into the world yet?

It’s time to jump

It’s time to go

You can watch the home videos tonight but tomorrow you have to delete them for storage and stop staying up late and stop being who you’ve been your entire life

You spent your entire life not knowing if the little boy in these home videos would be proud of who was watching him now. 18 years and the most important thing you learned is how blue the sky is at midnight and how to envy the life of a mountain. Also apparently the pillows talk and the whole world is spilling tea but you can only hear the voices in your head saying one phrase over and over and over and over and you’re finally starting to hear that

It’s time to go

I contemplate the significance of so many broken headlights. My hand touches the roof of my car but it’s not asking a question, it just likes the thought of reaching for made up words and a secret game waiting to be played again. Slowing falling to signal left I turn right where I need to go and soon I am surrounded by trees that bear more stories than our papers ever will. Papers hold our souls against their bodies with the stains of the earth to protect us from the cruel invaders. When the paper dances on the wind and bows in the fire it doesn’t destroy our souls just gives us one more heartbeat one more ripple in a puddle that likes the taste of paved sidewalks. Bright and fast a page turns and we get one more second to stich another string of our spirits before we have to go and stop pretending that it’s not still cold.

It’s time to go

Go go go we can’t be cold if we’re burning in the expectations set upon us by our ancestors descendants. I hope you’re doing well but I hope even more you’re not messing it all up not making mistakes not breaking free because that little boy in the home videos deserves to be proud of who he became it wasn’t his choice

it was your choice

It shouldn’t make you sad to see him but it does every time and so you try to distract yourself but all that comes to mind is that

It’s time to go

I hope you’re ready